Growing up, I shared a room with my sister. Not always, but usually, we used to talk each other to sleep. Then later at sleepovers, all tucked into sleeping bags or in beds propped up high on cinder-blocks with college roommates, these were the times I had the best conversations. There was just something about the darkness and the low pressure to keep the conversation going that brought up the most interesting topics.
So I was surprised when Ted and I first got married and we didn’t really talk in bed that much. Not worried or anything, just surprised. When Ted was in bed, he mostly wanted to be sleeping. But during the past year, I have noticed a gradual increase of late night conversations. It’s such a small change, but something that is really meaningful to me.
This is by no means the only example of ways that we have rubbed off on each other; ways that we have changed and adapted to fit each other. There are phrases that Ted says that I have adopted. I started kneeling to say my prayers in the mornings when before I would just scrunch down under the covers and say them half in my sleep. Ted has developed a new aptitude for appreciating the gourmet food stuff that I am into (or at least has gotten better at faking it.)
None of them are make or break kind of things, they aren’t crucial to the success of our marriage, and we are still very different in plenty of ways. But to me, these ways we have subtly tweaked our habits are a true testament that we love each other and care about each other enough to learn what makes us the happiest. They are a testament to the two years we have spent loving the crap out of each other as husband and wife and that makes me so happy and so excited for everything ahead of us that I can barely stand it.
This year for our anniversary, we followed our tradition from last year and went to a B&B in Canandaigua where Ted surprised me with the fanciest room in the joint, complete with jacuzzi and fireplace.
Ok so Ted might kill me for telling this story, but it is just too funny not to share. As I was filling up the jacuzzi tub, we decided that it might be nice to have a fire, so Ted got started on making it. The system they had for making fires in the fireplace involved cans of sterno fuel behind a fake log. We might not have been listening that intently while the proprietor explained it all to us, and Ted thought he said to tip the cans on their sides before lighting them. Which led the fuel to spilling out all over the inside of the fireplace. And then I was like, oh it’s okay, it’ll probably just burn off really quickly if you light it. So he lit the fire, and it was huge and just kept getting bigger, creeping around the sides of the fireplace. And then the smoke alarm started going off all throughout the building. So I was standing there in my robe on the edge of the tub fanning the smoke alarm while Ted was running back and forth from the bathroom with the hotel’s plastic champagne glass full of water. When Ted eventually went to let in the proprietor who was outside the door trying to figure out who’s room the alarm was coming from he (justifiably annoyed) told us that all the other guests had evacuated their rooms.
Bonus: an anniversary present straight from Munich, Germany…
Love that cute face.